A woman is only vulnerable when her nail polish is drying, and even then she can still pull a trigger.

– some great quote I heard somewhere once upon a time and that is very, very true  (via regardingsarah)

Im pretty sure mrs. walker from holes proved with her rattle snake venom infused nail polish that y’all are even more deadly when your nails are drying

(via swolizard)

(Source: traffic-jam-session, via funnybrunette)

spokenunspoken:

shaky:

I’m stuck between wanting:

1. A long lasting relationship with my soulmate who supports me and protects me and is my partner and we are completely bad ass together and in love

2. Wanting to have casual sex and rip out the heart of everyone person I meet

3. Being independent and having a loyal dog while I’m married to my career

It scares me how accurate this is.

(via embraceand-endure)

mrsclauses:

warpedtoursmoshpit:

today in 6th period, it was pouring rain and I arrived late to class due to appreciating the rainfall. so when I finally walked in, I was dripping wet and the teacher gave me a dirty look and said that she was going to mark me tardy with a referral to the office and I point my finger at her and said “no” and THEN THUNDER CRACKLED AT THAT EXACT MOMENT AND THE POWER WENT OUT and just to freak out everyone, I whisper “666” and this girl screamed. 

image

(via penisvvrinkle)

  • I'm in my father's class at my high school. He said this today:
  • Him: As some of you may not know, I'm a feminist.
  • class: *laughs*
  • Him: No, really, I am.
  • Class: *laughs again*
  • Him: Why is that funny?
  • Asshole: Because you're a man, and you shouldn't think that way.
  • Him: Well why not?
  • Asshole: I dunno that's just the way that is.
  • Him: I'm a feminist because of my wife. She and I have the EXACT same job. Yet, I make more than her.
  • Class: *laughs*
  • Him: Why is that funny? Shouldn't women be paid equally as men?
  • Same Asshole: No, they're supposed to be in the kitchen.
  • Him: *slams fist on asshole's desk* Why?
  • Asshole: Because that's how it is.
  • Him: Why?
  • Asshole: That's their job.
  • Him: Why?
  • Asshole: *can't come up with another answer*
  • Him: I'm a feminist because my wife has the exact same job, gets less pay, and with that, I can barely support my three children. If she got paid as much as me, life would be a bit easier for all of us.
  • *note, my mother is a teacher like my father*
  • Him: Women gave birth to us, and now, here in the state of Michigan, they can't even have their own rights? It's 2014 people! Grow up or get out of my class.
  • Class: *silence*
  • Him: Now.. Louis XVI